A Sobering Thought

Yesterday the dad of one of the guys on my floor treated our whole floor to Olive Garden. It was my first time going there, and I must say, I don't even know John's dad, but he is my hero now. They just keep feeding you until you explode! Then our waiter was an auditory learner, so all he had to do was hear our names once and he called us all by our names for the rest of the meal. All 14 of us. It was amazing. It was cool hanging out with my hallmates one last time.

I just wanted to say that before the sobering stuff. We were in the hallway before dinner, talking and getting ready to go, when the subject of roommates for next year came up. One girl was talking about her suitemate, who was getting all new roommates from Patterson. "Yeah, her old roommate was weird." "I know what you mean, she creeped me out." "You couldn't tell whether she was laughing or crying, but she did it all the time."

Eventually it came out that she had run off with her Internet boyfriend to Savannah. "So those pictures of the Abercrombie model she had everywhere were accurate?" "Well....she could've been lying." By this time, I was sick to my stomach. As soon as I had heard this girl's name, a memory immediately flew to my mind. When I was still going to house church a few months ago... She only came once and just spewed out all her fears and uncertainties. She was really lonely, and she reminded me of myself just a few months before. We prayed for her, and I saw her maybe once or twice in Maxcy after that.

I just stood there and listened to them eviscerate this girl for several more minutes. Finally there was an uncomfortable silence, and the girl's old suitemate said, "But she was nice and all. She brought me tea when I was sick one time..."

Oh, I wanted to scream then. I wanted to tell her that there was no use sugar-coating it now. That they didn't know anything. That they didn't know what she had gone through. But I didn't say a word. I just let my eyes sink into the floor.

It kinda spoiled the night, to tell the truth. I was wracked with guilt. She had been practically across the hall from me; couldn't I have gone over to see how she was doing? Should I have tried harder? I knew she was hurting; why didn't I do anything? Sure, I smiled at her a little wider when I did see her, but what the hell was that supposed to do, now that I look back on it? And if I had done something....would this have even happened?

Even worse...I know exactly how she felt, what it's like to be an outsider. College is the first time in ten years that there have been people like me, who share my interests and like my quirks. I know all too well how it feels to have people avoid you like the plague just because you're different. I knew just what she was going through, in that respect. And I still did nothing. Oh, God...why did I just sit there?

If you guys would, please help me pray for this girl. Her name's Kelly. Just that she's safe, and that wherever she is...she's happy.