I'm worn out. And anxious. Anxious about being too anxious again.

I never want a severe panic attack, cause this mild one scared the crap out of me. I thought I felt powerless before, but wanting to stop crying, wanting your chest to stop feeling like it's ripping in half, but not being able to is far worse.

Each little part of this is something I could face by itself. Together they proved too much to bear, a huge nasty thing that nearly immobilized me today. Anyway, I'm exhausted.

But people love me. And Jesus will see to it that I'm not alone tonight.

So I'll take a deep breath and wait for tomorrow.

All I need is hope...and a little bit of courage to pick up the pieces and keep going.